Home > Bathroom Etiquette, Personal Stories, Topic Discussion > Do You Pee Without Shame?

Do You Pee Without Shame?

No one can ever accuse He Shat She Shat of being skittish or shy about any topic that revolves around the bathroom.  If there is any question about my willingness to speak openly about even the most taboo of bathroom topics then turn around and look at the fact that this blog exists.  BAM!  Why, just yesterday a farted at my wife’s aunt at a family party when I told her I had some advice she needed to hear.  Seriously, very little shame – for better or for worse.

But I do have a secret shame.  The fact that someone like me could be made ashamed about anything involving bodily functions really speaks volumes to the amount of privacy and shame we have built into that tiny little room in each of our houses.  I have been trying to shake this shame for years but just can’t seem to do it.  I hope that by confessing it here I will soon be free.

It all started with college.  I lived in an apartment that had an unnaturally large space between the floor and bottom of the bathroom door.  Coupled with the infectious excitement of a new school year and apartment, we decided to invite people over to hang out.  Amongst the non-stop flow of carbonated beverage and conversation came the inevitable need to break the seal and piss.  So I excused myself into the bathroom, which lay only feet from the living room where people were talking.  Casually whipping it out and bracing myself for the initial burst of urine, I realized that I could hear each and every word from the other room.  The gap underneath the door amplified each sound as if it were taking place in front of me.

And that is when I realized I was embarrassed by the sound of my own urine.

Knowing that everyone would hear my piss splashing against the toilet bowl water meant they would be forced to imagine me standing there holding my Genny and urinating.  For some reason, that filled me with shame.  I found this shame was amplified by the fact that women were present.  So I sat (yes, I sat…something I now often do when I pee) and aimed the stream at the side of the porcelain so it wouldn’t splash against the water.  Instead it dispersed against the toilet wall and then dripped down quietly.  This is a scenario that has continued to play out for the last decade whenever there is anyone outside of my immediate family present.  I have tried to overcome the issue by forcing myself to piss with force into the water, knowing that people would hear and judge me.  But in the end I find myself sitting in pathetic apathy to my hang up.

I hope that some kind soul will tell me I’m not alone here.  Do you splash without shame?

  1. HuPhlungPu
    June 28, 2011 at 7:03 am

    due to my mom’s relentless nagging, my dad only pees sitting down, so i’m sure he experiences the splash you speak of. there are others…just like you.

  2. June 29, 2011 at 5:28 pm

    Turn the faucet on to drown out the sound of your pee. Should do the trick. 😉

  3. June 29, 2011 at 9:04 pm

    Killer advice Young American Wisdom – and I do! Particularly at parties or when people are eating close the bathroom I’m using. But why do I have to do these masking techniques? I should just pee it out without shame…

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