Home > Bathroom Etiquette, Farting, Topic Discussion > Is There An Appropriate Place To Fart?

Is There An Appropriate Place To Fart?

I don’t know about you, but when I was growing up farting was enforced as a no-no. My mother tried desperately to encourage us to not fart openly around the house. Unfortunately, her plight was futile as my father consistently farted at the dinner table and encourage the children to look under the table for passing “ducks” or “crocodiles.” No matter how hard she tried, she eventually failed and gave in to defeat. One of her consistent pleas was that farting was reserved for the bathroom and that we should retire there to do our deed. While that sounds like a good idea, who really does that in practice? Instead the most conservative farters simply wait until they have privacy at any given time to let it rip – whether that be in the car, an office or open air.

As I think back on the advice from my mother that farting was reserved for the bathroom, I begin to question her counsel. Is the bathroom really the place for farting? What is the rule on that? I’m sure we can all think back to a situation where we sat quietly on the can, enjoying a doogan fresh, when somebody in the stall next to us began ripping liquidy or dry raspy air from their anal cavity without shame or remorse. We have all had our noses flooded with the fumes, raped by the smells as they enter our nostrils. Is a bathroom really an excuse to drop an air bomb, or should we hold ourselves to a higher standard of only farting in privacy? My brother has always told me that he doesn’t like to have someones poo particles floating up into his nose, regardless of where he is.

It certainly has me thinking. In reality, there is no sure spot for farting. I have had several occasions where I had presumed privacy (corner of the gym, elevator, my cubicle) only to have someone walk in seconds after I have juiced the atmosphere with a warm, slithering fart. In each situation I was judged harshly, even hated, by the victim. I wonder if I get those same faces of judgment and hate from the other side of the stall when I do this in the bathroom. I just don’t know if there is any answer to this question. For now I am going to continue with the assumption that “you’re damned if you do, you’re damned if you don’t” and continue to fart whenever, and wherever, I please.

  1. August 2, 2011 at 6:44 pm

    I think the best place to fart is in an area where it is easy to blame someone else. Plane, subway, in line at the DMV – just make a face and keep looking at the same person across the way.

    • August 3, 2011 at 8:15 pm

      Genius Matt, genius. I think your plan is basically perfect. You know what I do to ensure that i don’t get blamed? I carry my 18 month old around so that if people starting judging me I can just pretend to check his diaper and then roll my eyes. Works every time.

  2. lee
    October 18, 2011 at 5:06 am

    My gf hates it when I fart,althou my farts don’t always smell they are loud and sound gross to here but I’m the one who laughs.I fart for about 3 seconds at a time so you can imagine what it sound like.but!!! Its always fun and good when you around your mates! 🙂

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