Home > Bathroom, Humor > Toilet Seat Defamation – Cruel and Unusual Punishment

Toilet Seat Defamation – Cruel and Unusual Punishment

There are very few crimes that I believe deserve life imprisonment.  Obviously rape and murder fall into that category.  I’d consider chucking someone’s butt in jail for life if they were heavily involved in child pornography or child abuse.  But I would have no qualms for throwing your butt in jail if you leave your filthy fecal mess and urine droplets all over the toilet seat.  I’m thinking execution if you ruin the corner stall.

What you don’t understand, you sick bastage, is that when you drop your urine on the seat or don’t flush your diarrhea, you basically ruin the stall for everyone until someone comes and cleans it up.  Do YOU go in the stall that has a toilet seat with crap filled to the brim or urine all over it?  No, you don’t.  So why would you leave it that way?  FLUSH for craps sakes!  And if you drop urine everywhere, get some effing toilet paper out and clean that mother up!  When you don’t, you lower the quantity of available stalls for other patrons and cause us to sit closer to each other or, heaven forbid, wait in a men’s bathroom to take a dump.

I think we need to remember the sacred nature of the bathroom and the toilets that we share.  You wouldn’t walk into a fine restaurant with muddy shoes, would you?  So why would you defame a honored and shared space like the toilet?  Is it because you are in a private space and no one can see your actions?  If so, then that speaks a lot to your true character as a human being.  If you are guilty, it is time to make some New Year’s resolutions to quit being such a sleazy douche bag. 

Happy New Years HSSS fans!

  1. JWo
    January 3, 2012 at 3:47 pm

    We had a guy like that in our building.

    He’d make a toilet paper masterpiece on the seat so his ass cheeks wouldn’t get germs then leave it there when he was done so everyone else could admire it.

    Now we’ve got the guy that doesn’t want to open the door with his clean hands and leaves his dirty paper towels by the door.

    http://thelifeofjwo.wordpress.com/2011/11/16/open-letter-to-the-bathroom-guy/

    But Toilet Seat Turd is definitely worth being strung up by the scrote.

    • January 4, 2012 at 7:40 pm

      JWo, well said. I prefer the person leaving their dirty towels by the door. My office just put a garbage can there and that has helped the situation. There is no easy fix for the sicko that defames a toilet seat with his liquid or solid waste.

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