Home > Business, Humor > Why Do I Get Diarrhea When I Give a Presentation?

Why Do I Get Diarrhea When I Give a Presentation?

It’s been a while, but back in my previous employment I had to give a lot of presentations in front of a lot of people.  Not just people.  Important people.  People who with the flick of a finger could have me beheaded in the form of having me canned.  People who had done it before and would do it again if anything displeased them or if their temperament was off.  In addition to the few people who could destroy my career, there were usually an additional 20-100 people present to up the notch on the fear-o-meter.

When faced with this type of presentation, my routine was as such:

sleep like crap
Wake up ridiculously early in order to stop the fretting pointlessly in the dark
Avoid breakfast, and possibly vomit acid all morning
Have diarrhea
Get to presentation
Urinate and diarrhea again
10 minutes later, urinate and diarrhea again
Diarrhea
Give presentation
Urinate and possibly one more episode of diarrhea

What is the deal with my body ejecting every form of liquid and waste from any orifice it can find when I am stressed?  I haven’t even pointed out the sweat.  Where does my body find all this liquid and why does it choose the most inconvenient moment possible to get rid of it?

  1. almostshatmyself
    September 18, 2012 at 4:24 am

    I laughed my arse off when I read your post. I feel the EXACT same way. Same issues. I think it’s just all in our heads. I was looking into possibly some anti-anxiety medication but it looks like that can cause diarrhea. I even thought about taking that stuff the proctologist tells you to drink the night before a colonoscopy thinking there would be nothing left to expel but I fear there might be some lingering in the am. I think we’re screwed because it probably wouldn’t be a good idea to go in smelling like alcohol.

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