Archive

Posts Tagged ‘Crime’

Farting in Public – To Shame or to Be Ashamed?

I was in the bus the other day on my way to work.  At the moment I was enjoying some Words With Friends time.  Quick side note – how awesome is Words With Friends?  It has the whole world playing one of my favorite games which is Scrabble.  While I have been playing Scrabble online for about 11 years, I finally have many friends to play against and subsequently destroy over and over.  It’s a great pride booster. 
 
But I digress.  I was on my way home when suddenly the air filled with putrid butt-raunched gas.  Someone had effectively dropped a fart bomb in complete stealth mode – there was no indication as to who was the culprit and where they were sitting.  I could tell that everyone wanted to look around and sniff the individual out.  But we didn’t.  You know why?  Because society would have you believe that it’s more appropriate to pretend nothing happened then to divulge the perpetrator.  Society would have you believe that if you can squeeze one out silently, you don’t have to own up to it.  It’s that kind of behavior that leads people to commit crimes and other people to pretend they aren’t happening. 
I think we should have to own up to our farts – in public or private.  Clothing manufacturers should be required by law to line our pants with a special chemical that emits a purple glow when touched by human fart air.  Then we would all just have to accept that we fart and, empowered with knowledge, we could move away from the person who has fouled our breathing supply.  It might lead us all to eat better to avoid farting.  It might lead to more mercy and patience with our fellow men and women.  I think this could really change the human race for good.
 
HSSS, you a genius.